{"id":26572,"date":"2025-05-15T09:00:00","date_gmt":"2025-05-15T16:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/?p=26572"},"modified":"2025-05-14T18:32:04","modified_gmt":"2025-05-15T01:32:04","slug":"review-final-destination-bloodlines","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/review-final-destination-bloodlines\/","title":{"rendered":"Review: <i>Final Destination: Bloodlines<\/i>"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>I have never heard a movie audience cheer so loudly at the death of a child onscreen as I did in <em>Final Destination Bloodlines<\/em>. Yet such celebrations aren\u2019t unusual for the <em>Final Destination<\/em> franchise, known as much for its creative kills as for establishing most of its doomed characters as real pieces of shit before they bite it. In this cruel cinematic universe, you\u2019re not supposed to feel sadness or empathy when an asshole credited simply as \u201cRacist\u201d dies. There\u2019s no mourning in this world, only screams and laughs, and then it\u2019s on to the next one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>By nature, horror movie franchises are built on formulas, deviating just enough to keep fans returning for entry after entry. But few series so rigorously follow their own conventions as <em>Final Destination<\/em>, which churned out reliably entertaining movies without much invention outside of the ever more innovative deaths \u2014 until <em>Bloodlines<\/em>, that is. The sixth movie in the series mixes up the formula just enough to feel like it\u2019s doing something new, while still giving audiences what they like: plenty of imaginative deaths and new fears to worry about on their way home from the theater.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>Bloodlines<\/em> briefly touches on the equations built into its premise thanks to our heroine, Stefani Reyes (Kaitlyn Santa Juana), a stressed-out college student who the movie kinda hints might be a math major or something. This series is not big on details outside of its Rube Goldberg-esque killing machines; any more explanation might have made this one (already the series\u2019 longest) even lengthier. However, <em>Bloodlines<\/em>\u2019 biggest departure might be that it\u2019s actually a genuinely good movie and not just a fun one. (My apologies to the rest of the series, except for <em>The Final Destination<\/em>, which can rot in hell alongside all of its characters).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Formerly an A student, Stefani has been struggling after months of having the same distressing dream. Night after night, she sees her grandmother Iris as a young woman (Brec Bassinger) in 1969, and she dies with countless others in a disaster that destroys a restaurant that was perched 500 feet at the top of a tower. When she meets her grandmother in the present (Gabrielle Rose), she learns that she had a premonition about their deaths, and her warning helped save everyone from dying. But, as we\u2019ve heard countless times before (okay, five times), death has a design and doesn\u2019t like being denied. Over the decades, it hasn\u2019t only killed off each of the survivors from the restaurant, but also their descendants, who were never meant to be alive in the first place.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"683\" src=\"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/final-destination-bloodlines2-1024x683.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-26574\" srcset=\"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/final-destination-bloodlines2-1024x683.png 1024w, https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/final-destination-bloodlines2-768x512.png 768w, https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/final-destination-bloodlines2-1200x800.png 1200w, https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/05\/final-destination-bloodlines2.png 1242w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<p>Instead of the series\u2019 usual pattern of a group of friends and acquaintances trying to survive, <em>Bloodlines <\/em>\u2014 true to its title \u2014 focuses on Iris\u2019s children and grandchildren when it is finally their time to die. With a family as its focus, this entry has a bit more emotional heft and thematic weight than its predecessors \u2026 but not quite so much that seeing them die in crazy ways isn\u2019t still a lot of fun.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And on top of being fun,<em> Bloodlines<\/em> is really funny. The script by Guy Busick and Lori Evans Taylor has jokes that actually land (which is more than I can say for most of the people in these movies). It doesn\u2019t just wring laughs out of how enjoyably stupid it is, as its predecessors have done. There is still some stupidity present, predictably in how some characters behave, but <em>Bloodlines<\/em> itself isn\u2019t dumb, and it doesn\u2019t treat the audience like it is either. There\u2019s clear affection for this franchise and for the fans, and not just in the brief appearance from the late horror legend Tony Todd, who appeared in all of the previous films except the worst one and earned applause from the audience. <em>Bloodlines<\/em> is the series at its most self-aware, but it avoids the smugness of other recent reboots like <a href=\"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/review-scream-vi\/\"><em>Scream VI<\/em><\/a> (which, weirdly, Busick also co-wrote).&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This is also the series at its best \u2014 or at least tying with <em>Final Destination 3<\/em>. Santa Juana isn\u2019t on level with the third film\u2019s lead, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, in terms of charm, but she\u2019s great at communicating concern and terror. Yet the film understood the assignment, delivering gruesome, imaginative kills that are among some of the series\u2019 best (or worst, depending on your perspective). They\u2019re admirably gross, and you can just see writers Busick and Evans Taylor and directors Zach Lipovsky and Adam B. Stein rubbing their hands with glee over how people will react to their sick creation. And react they did: people audibly groaned and laughed and shrieked with glee. It\u2019s been over a decade since the last movie and a quarter century since the first one, but the <em>Bloodlines<\/em> filmmakers have found a way to reinvent the <em>Final Destination<\/em> wheel \u2014 and then promptly crush someone\u2019s head with it.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-link-color has-huge-font-size wp-elements-940da8c9ea22e4c8fe003384e4404980\" style=\"color:#fe0404\"><strong>B+<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p><em>&#8220;Final Destination: Bloodlines&#8221; is in theaters this weekend.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-video is-provider-youtube wp-block-embed-youtube wp-embed-aspect-16-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"Final Destination Bloodlines | Official Trailer\" width=\"760\" height=\"428\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/UWMzKXsY9A4?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The first \u201cFinal Destination\u201d film in over a decade is the best one yet.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":594,"featured_media":26575,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"inline_featured_image":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[340],"tags":[1098],"class_list":["post-26572","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-movie-reviews","tag-movie-review"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26572","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/594"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=26572"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26572\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26577,"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26572\/revisions\/26577"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/26575"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=26572"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=26572"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/crookedmarquee.com\/stage8\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=26572"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}