The following is an excerpt from a document found in a trash can near the men’s bathroom at CinemaCon 2017. Dear Future Investors, Movie theaters, am I right? Gross! Who among us hasn’t wanted to see the latest installment in Universal’s “Dark Universe” opening weekend, only to be turned off by the prospect of screaming […]
Read more
[The following contains huge spoilers for Annabelle: Creation as well as the other films in The Conjuring franchise. So consider yourself warned. SPOILERS AHEAD.] Annabelle: Creation, opening this week, is the latest in the increasingly convoluted universe of 2013’s The Conjuring, hereafter to be referred to as the “Conjurverse” (trademark pending) which also includes The […]
Read more
Annabelle: Creation is a prequel to Annabelle, which was a spinoff of The Conjuring, which was about the work of a pair of real-life paranormal investigators who really did once have a case involving a creepy doll. Now, at last, we can learn where the doll came from and how it got to be evil, […]
Read more
Boy, that stunt/elaborate suicide attempt in the latest Tom Cruise blockbuster looks like a time and a half. I didn’t name which one because I want this article to work until at least 2030, maybe 2040. These days, Tom Cruise hasn’t just become synonymous with actors doing their own stunts, he’s made it a core […]
Read more
When HBO announced its greenlighting of Confederate, a new series from the show-runners of Game of Thrones, the news was met with a barrage of outrage thanks to its provocative premise: It’s set in an alternate America where the Civil War ended in a stalemate, the North and South exist as separate enemy territories, and […]
Read more
Detroit is about one of the more unpleasant things to have happened in a city where so many unpleasant things have happened that you can elicit a feeling of despair just by naming your movie after it. (“Wanna go see Detroit?” “No, that sounds depressing.”) Directed with well-placed outrage by Kathryn Bigelow from a screenplay by […]
Read more
A personal sacrifice, when done right, can be an incredibly moving and effective part of a story. When done wrong, it can deflate the entire narrative. Often, the difference is between a true sacrifice and an unearned gimmick. For the sake of relevance, we’ll look at the sacrifices in Dunkirk, Christopher Nolan’s latest film, and […]
Read more
“Hooray for Hollywood” will never sound right to me without the tin-can hiss of a VHS tape many times rewound. Growing up in the bleak hinterlands of northeast Ohio, I longed for what a 5-year-old considers Shangri-La – Central Florida. We made an almost-annual pilgrimage to Postcardland, to wave at Goofy, scream at Jaws and, […]
Read more
War for the Planet of the Apes opens with scenes that are familiar to American viewers: soldiers silently work their way through the jungle, looking for the enemy. The camera angle switches and they pull up short: three Kong have been spotted on the hill. The soldiers’ helmets are scrawled with slogans for morale, and […]
Read more
To the extent that there are James Bonds in the real world — dashing, highly skilled secret agents who can kill enemies with a rolled-up newspaper — surely by now there are also Jane Bonds. Yet Hollywood has offered few lady spies worthy of the comparison, leaving a void now filled by Atomic Blonde, a […]
Read more
The final scene of 1999’s Eyes Wide Shut takes place in a toy store. As Dr. Bill Harford and his wife, Alice, let their young daughter run around to pick out Christmas presents, they discuss the future of their relationship. It’s been a harrowing two days for the pair, as Alice revealed her emotional infidelity […]
Read more
Until 1968, the term “zombie” was used to refer to the Haitian folklore belief of reanimating a dead body through magical means. In 1972, films with a distinctly feminist point of view were rare, with the popularity of the “women’s lib” movement still in its infancy. In 1978, the vampire film was old news, as […]
Read more